‘If We Were Meant to Be Alone, We Would All Live on Our Own Planet.’
“Connection is why we’re here; it is what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.” (Brené Brown)
Think about it for a moment. There are billions of planets scattered across the universe, surely enough for every one of us to have our own quiet corner of space. And yet here we all are, together, on this one small blue planet, bumping into each other, loving each other, needing each other. That does not feel like an accident to me. We are here for love and connection and more.
I came across a version of this idea years ago and it has stayed with me ever since. We were never meant to do this life on our own. Connection is the thread that quietly weaves meaning into our days, turning strangers into friends, hard times into growth, and loneliness into belonging.
The Pull We Cannot Quite Explain
Have you ever been thinking about someone, and moments later your phone lights up and there they are? A call, a message, right as they crossed your mind. We have all experienced it. Those small moments are gentle reminders of the invisible threads running between us. We are far more connected than we realise, even in the times when life has us feeling alone.
We Are Wired Like the Trees
Nature shows us this everywhere. Picture a forest. Above the ground each tree looks like it is standing there on its own. Underneath the soil, their roots are woven together in a vast hidden network, quietly passing nutrients back and forth, the stronger trees helping to feed the ones that are doing it tough. No tree grows in true isolation. We are the same. We are built to lean on each other, to share what we have, and to be held when our own roots are struggling.
When We Pull Away
And yet, when life knocks us around, our instinct is so often to withdraw. In my book I describe a place in ‘The Tip’ I call the ‘Loneliness Gorge,’ a vast empty space echoing with isolation. We feel misunderstood, so we pull back, and the pulling back leaves us feeling even more alone. It becomes a quiet loop. The very thing we need most, connection, is the thing we slowly start avoiding.
If you find yourself in that gorge right now, please know there is nothing wrong with you. Reaching out when you feel most like hiding is one of the bravest and most human things you can do. A single honest conversation can be the rope that pulls you back up into the light.
Solitude Is Not the Same as Loneliness
This is not about forcing yourself to be busy and surrounded all the time. We all connect in different ways. Some of us recharge in a room full of people, some in the quiet of our own space, and many of us are a gentle mix of both. Choosing solitude to rest and refill your cup is a beautiful thing. Stepping back from a relationship that drains or wounds you is sometimes a loving choice there is. That kind of disconnection is not a rejection of love. It is how we protect the love we owe ourselves, so we have something real to give when we return.
A Question to Sit With
As you move through this week, carry one gentle question with you:
‘Who could I reach out to and reconnect with, simply to let them know they matter?’
You do not need a reason or an occasion. A quick message, a phone call, a shared coffee. And please hear this with no judgement, we all retreat into our shell sometimes. We were never meant to journey through this life alone. We are here, together on this one small planet, for love and connection. So let us reach for it.
Have a great week,
Michael
📖 Where the F*ck Do Our Minds Go? → Get the book